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COMMUNITY NEWS

The Prater's Creek Gazette

20th Issue Winter 2008 Page #2


Livwright's Now Offers Hi-Fi

Always looking to stay ahead of the big box stores, Livwright's General Store is now offering HI-FI. "That's right" owner Todd Livwright said, "the store had to do it after Grandpa, of The Drovers Old Time Medicine Show got drunk and broke the crank on the store's Victorola. We got us a nice un too!" Mr. Livwright said, "you can stack up to six records on that Hi-Fi. We got a copy of Ernest Tubb's Greatest Hits, three Bill Monroe albums, and two by The Stanley Brothers!"

Former GOP VP Candidate Leaves Husband

It seems Sarah Palin wanted to make the news one last time. It was announced that Mrs. Palin was leaving her husband to take up with Jimmy Moore, Uncle Carl's VP candidate.

The two VP hopefuls met last summer when Mr. Moore was on a hunting trip up in Alaska.

Mrs. Palin told the Gazette "He's the kind of man I've always wanted, you betcha. He's 'Joe's Six Pack', well really 'Joe Case'" she winked and added, "as soon as he's out of jail I'm gonna show him what a maverick in the bedroom I am, you betcha!"

 

Recent Death Investigated As MurderStumpy's Ad

The recent death of Mike Cord has raised the suspicions of local law enforcement. As reported in the last issue of the Gazette, Mike Cord was found lifeless at the Sawmill after The Drovers Old Time Medicine Show performed there. "Why, his head was torn off and and he looked like he'd been shredded" Sheriff David Stone told the Gazette.

 

Local Textile Plant To Close After 61 Years

Local Textile plant, Devoid/Mengele, announced it will be closing in the next few months. Many of the plant's employees were inspirations here at the Gazette and The Drovers Old Time Medicine Show wrote many songs about them, including the title song of their second album, Melissa's Waltz. Three songs on their next album are also about former employees. "Ernest" a song about a man everybody thought was going to kill them, and two songs about the love of Grandpa's life, a girl named Beverly, who inspired the songs "I'm Gonna Try My Best To Forget You" and "There's Nobody Else But You".

No word yet on where Tammy Goff will go when the plant closes it doors, but we here at The Gazette promise to keep you informed on the petite redhead with alabaster skin.


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